Relationships: Questions to ask yourself

  1. What is this relationship?
    • mutual dependency?
    • mutual love?
    • mutual attraction?
    • nothing mutual at all/a balance of interests?
    • something to tell your friends about?
    • a means in which to rehash childhood pain?
    • a means in which to replay relationships with your parents?
  2. Why this person?
    • Would I be happier with this person than without?
    • Would I be a better person with this person than without?
    • Is this person a reflection of me?
    • Is this person a reflection of my parent(s)?
    • Does this person represent moving toward something or running away from something?
    • Does this person like me for me/do I like this person for who this person is? Or is it about:
      • money?
      • status?
      • fear of being alone?
      • peer pressure?
      • purely physical attraction?
      • sex addiction?
      • love addiction?
      • boredom?
  3. Why this relationship?
    • open or closed?
    • honest or deceitful?
    • public or private?
    • now or in the future?
    • short term or long term?
    • well defined or amorphous?
    • intimate or adolescent?
  4. Why me?
    • Would this person be better off without me?
    • Am I ready for this relationship?
    • Am I the person I want to be in this relationship?
    • Do I need to be in a relationship at all?

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